This Belongs in a Museum
Bringing you museum-approved grammatical errors and typos since 2010.
Oh, and sorry - I DO NOT FOLLOW BACK!
Because Black History Month ends tomorrow and this week’s theme seems to be all about wax, I believe this is the perfect time to tell you about Oran Z’s Pan African Black Facts and Wax Museum. Located in the middle of a strip mall in south Los Angeles, this sprawling museum isn’t just full of famous black figures cast in wax (like President Barack Obama and Supreme Court Justice Thurgood Marshall above). No, it’s also home to thousands of Black Americana artifacts, everything from slave shackles and once-popular “Mamie” cookie jars to a flag signed by Barack Obama and an African-American reference library. There are old advertisements, Negro League baseball memorabilia, postcards, toys, sheet music, KKK paraphernalia and even antique Kente cloths. If you’re lucky, the owner Oran Z. Belgrave (who also happens to be the inventor of the World’s Fastest Hair Weaver, which has its own museum display and is available for purchase in the shop of course) will give you a personal tour. According to Oran Z, he is ”just a collector…I present the figures and the facts, and it’s up to you to interpret what’s important. I collect everything African-American. If it’s for blacks, against blacks, I collect it all.” This whole thing began decades ago when Oran Z collected cookie jars and play dolls of African-American design. His collection grew to include African-American documents, books and wax figures. In December of 1999, his collection became a museum, bankrolled with his highly successful hair-weaving product. The museum quickly outgrew its original 2,000-square-foot space and adjacent 14,000-square-foot storage. Now six shipping containers sit behind the building housing separate collections, including “Holocaust of Black America,” with a partly reconstructed slave ship and racks of black mannequins shackled to wood frames. He hosts field trips and community events where children can learn more about African culture, and hopes many of his exhibits will travel across the country to be displayed in schools. Unfortunately, his museum might be forced to move or close due to a redevelopment and gentrification plan. ”I guess they don’t think it’s a good idea to have a black museum owned by a black man located in a black neighborhood on Martin Luther King Boulevard,” says Oran Z.
Tonight is the 85th Academy Awards aka The Oscars aka The Big Night For The Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences aka These Are The Stupid People Who Gave An Oscar To Gwyneth Freakin’ Paltrow. Anyway, long before Hollywood was Hollywood, it was a citrus ranch. In 1895, a barn was built on what is now Selma and Vine Streets that housed horses, carriages, hay and other farm supplies. Nearly twenty years later in March of 1913, the Burns and Revier Studio and Laboratory was established inside the barn. That same year, Cecil B. DeMille* and Jesse Lasky, leased the barn and studio facilities for $250.00 a month and began production of The Squaw Man, the first feature film to be produced in Hollywood. After being moved around a lot, this landmark building was boarded up and abandoned until a permanent site could be found. Today the restored barn is home to the Hollywood Heritage Museum, now located at the southern end of the Hollywood Bowl parking lot. Open since 1985, the museum features archival photographs, film props, historical documents, postcards and even a recreation of Mr. DeMille’s office complete with a typewriter, film canisters, movie posters and of course booze. And on special occasions called “Evenings at the Barn,” visitors get a chance to see silent films. ”All right, Mr. DeMille, I’m ready for my close-up”…Sunset Boulevard received 11 Academy Award nominations, and won only 3. And that there’s your Oscar trivia, folks!
*Did you know Richard DeMille, son of Cecil, was the personal assistant of Scientology founder of L. Ron Hubbard? The cult, I mean religion, is a Hollywood thing so if it wasn’t for that barn maybe Battlefield Earth would never have been made.
I didn’t intend for this to be Presidents Week, but it just sort of happened, so let’s finish this freakin’ thing! Believe it or not, there is an actual Presidents Museum in a high school in San Diego. Yeah, talk about random. Started by one of the history teachers, Jim Fletcher, the collection of presidential memorabilia is displayed in the school library. In 1996 Mr. Fletcher began searching for presidential campaign memorabilia as a way to teach the seniors in his social science class about history. The Museum of the American Presidency officially opened that year with 2,000 presidential campaign items from all 44 presidents. The collection is actually quite impressive. Some items on display include Bill Clinton’s golf shoes, a smiling Richard Nixon shower head, and a 1980s “First Family Paper Doll Book” with Ronnie, Nancy, Ron Jr. and Patti Reagan and cutouts of clothes, accessories and furnishings. Some of the other Reagan collectibles include his beloved Western gear and Nancy’s rose-colored glasses as well as a framed picture of Frank Sinatra signed “Ron, you did it my way. Frank.” A student favorite is a portrait of President William McKinley, drawn in one continuous line. An original Nathaniel Currier drawing from 1844 of all 11 presidents to that point, including President-elect James K. Polk, is also on display. A miniature “JFK 464” license plate, never used, is probably one of the more unique items, while a display case full of Woodrow Wilson paraphernalia is worth at least $10,000. So how did Clairemont High School get all this stuff? Fletcher’s students wrote letters to collectors around the country asking for donations, which resulted in all of the items visitors and students can see today. This activity not only helped enliven the history class for students but led them to better appreciate the ideas and stories behind the campaigns and lives of U.S. presidents. So if you’re ever in San Diego, don’t worry…the museum is open to the public during school hours. Just go to the school’s front office, sign in and tell them you want to visit the library’s museum. And if you’re lucky, the school might let you into the meeting room (when it’s not in use) to see more of extensive collection.
We all have opinions on what is considered “real art”. As someone who grew up with a mom who was a struggling artist, I have many thoughts on this subject, and have covered it a few times already on this blog. I still have the vivid memory of an older student in one of my art history classes going on and on about how Picasso couldn’t draw (um…he could…have you seen his earlier work?) and how much she loved Norman Rockwell. Well, my apologies for sounding like an artsy fartsy snob, but the late Thomas Kinkade was not an artist, he was a businessman. And we all know this is very true, after all he was America’s most-collected living artist, making well over 70 million dollars. His paintings of glowing, oversaturated stone cottages in woodsy environments are supposedly found in one in every twenty American homes, including the White House. Shame on you, Mr. President!
If most museologists believe today’s museums exist only to make money, then the Thomas Kinkade National Archive Gallery fits right in with this world. Located in the historic Harry A. Greene Mansion in Monterey, California, the archive has the largest display of Kinkade “originals”, including some of his earliest known work. And of course there is a gift shop. Hey, where you do think that chick in the photo got her copy of The Thomas Kinkade Story? I mean we’re talking about a guy who licensed his “art” with Hallmark and other corporations like Walmart making it nearly impossible to never see one of his images. Try to escape…you can’t! Since his death last April, there are plans to establish a legacy for the “Painter of Light” with a more official museum and cultural center. While some of you start to prepare for the apocalypse and others attempt to contain your excitement at the thought of a real Thomas Kinkade Museum, let me leave you with this quote from writer Joan Didion:
“A Kinkade painting was typically rendered in slightly surreal pastels. It typically featured a cottage or a house of such insistent coziness as to seem actually sinister, suggestive of a trap designed to attract Hansel and Gretel. Every window was lit, to lurid effect, as if the interior of the structure might be on fire.”
Forget about Stephen King’s Pet Sematary (even though I do like the movie adaptation’s title track by the Ramones) for a minute and turn your attention to Los Angeles Pet Memorial Park, the final resting place for dead pets of the stars. One of the oldest of its kind on the West Coast, this 10-acre cemetery in Calabasas, California was dedicated in 1928 and operated by the Jones family until they donated it to the Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals in 1973. There are over 40,000 animals buried here. Years ago I visited a pet cemetery even older than this one, the Hinsdale Animal Cemetery, and I thought it was nice to see the loving messages left by the pet owners as well as the photo ceramics of some of the animals. Nothing spooky about it at all. But maybe that’s because I like hanging out in graveyards. But whatever your opinion, nothing is wrong with paying your respects to Rudolph Valentino’s dog Kabar, Lionel Barrymore’s cat Pukie, Hopalong Cassidy’s Topper, Little Rascals’ Pete, Humphrey Bogart’s dog Droopy and Charlie Chaplin’s cat Boots and the lesser known animals (check out Tawny the Lion) buried at the park. Also, the mausoleum is decorated with stained glass windows of pets. How cool is that? Anyway, if you’re interested, here are some more pictures of the place.
Yesterday’s alien abduction post went over like a lead balloon, so let me redeem my sins with a visit to Salvation Mountain. Located on a hill north of Slab City, California, just several miles from the Salton Sea, this art installation was created by local resident Leonard Knight, who found the Lord Jesus Christ in the 1960s. With adobe, straw, and thousands of gallons of paint, Knight began to make numerous murals with Bible verses and Christian sayings (“Jesus Is The Way” “God Never Fails” “God Forgives Sinners”). But after nearly thirty years, the future of the art project is in doubt as 80-year old Knight was recently put into a convalescent home outside San Diego. (read this story) Several Slab City residents have agreed to watch over the mountain and scare off vandals, but usually “outsider art” sites just fade away. Hopefully, with enough volunteers and donated paint…and the grace of God…Salvation Mountain will live for eternity. Amen.
Believe it or not, we’ve covered a Fan Museum here on the old blog once before, but we forgot the U.S. has one too. Yes, England has some competition in the hand fan department from Healdsburg, California. Located in a small room in the H2 Hotel, America’s Only Hand Fan Museum is dedicated to providing “educational and cultural enrichment to the public by utilizing the hand fan as a vehicle for teaching history, art and geography”…because everyone knows how important fans are. No sarcasm, I believe in global warming so I want to know everything there is to know about fans. Only a fraction of the 3,000 fans in the collection are on display at any given time, and the exhibits are rotated quite frequently, but it’s all good because the museum is free. There’s even a documentary. And what kind of place would this be without a shop that sells fans (not the Justin Bieber kind), ranging from one dollar paper pieces of crap to pricey vintage versions.
Unfortunately, they don’t have a “Hand Fan Museum” fan. Too meta.
Today I learned there is a small kingdom called Boomeria outside of Santa Cruz, California. Yes, you read that last sentence correctly. The King, also known as Mr. Preston Boomer, has been teaching physics and chemistry at San Lorenzo Valley High School for over fifty years when he’s not busy sitting on his throne. It all started in the 1950s in the yard of his house, far away in the forest. Students (or should I say serfs) helped construct a wooden castle with a dungeon, turrets, cannons and underground catacombs. They also repaired an 1879 pipe organ with 2,500 pipes in a newly built chapel, which is so impressive people come from all over to hear its music. His students, known as the “Brotherhood of the Natural Philosophers” (um…what about the ladies?), have learned all about science through this magical world of music, history and war while hanging out next to a swimming pool called the “Main Aqueous Ammunition Bunker”. Something tells me I would’ve enjoyed this dude as a teacher more than the one I had in high school. Every single day she would share with us her favorite fungus or bacteria. Exciting shit. Anyway, back to the castle. While the students dug the tunnels for the dungeon, they found bones of an animal that resembles a dinosaur so the reconstructed skeleton now hangs in the command center. More science lessons are to found in the main engine room, where the water to the cannons is controlled, as well as the control room, which holds an elaborate telegraph system used for communication and steam power engines. Because let’s not forget…not just anyone is allowed in the kingdom. The entire property is wired with horns, sirens and bells. The loudest is called the Weapon Beulah, a Navy foghorn that can be heard from miles away. And of course what science classroom would this be without a laboratory, this one happens to be full of ancient chemicals and experiments. While Boomeria is a man’s castle (and private home), King Boom opens it up to the public every year for Christmas Carols, the Santa Cruz Baroque Festival, known as Boomeria Extravaganza, and occasionally to private groups. A few years ago some Google employees got to hang out in Boomtown’s secret passages, and play with the toys and shit. Because they have such a difficult life, those Google princes. Whatevs.
It’s not a songbird, it’s not Led Zeppelin’s airplane, it’s not a even a Musical Instrument Museum…it’s the Museum of Making Music. Get it right, man. Part of the National Association of Music Merchants, the mission of the eleven year old museum in California is to “celebrate the rich history and encourage the future of music making.”
The permanent exhibits tell the history of American popular music from the 19th century to the present, mostly focusing on the manufacture and retail of musical instruments in the music products industry. There are more than 450 vintage instruments and artifacts on display, hundreds of audio samples of obscure early 20th century songs…and yes, they take their name seriously…a place where you can literally make music if you want.
What did I learn? That there’s always a Chicago connection. In the late 19th/early 20th centuries, Chicago was the western hub of the music industry. When I hear the name Lyon & Healy, I always think of the ghost sign on the side their old building on Wabash now owned by DePaul University. Founded in 1864, this harp manufacturer is still in existence today. They were one of the first retailers to use the radio for advertising by sponsoring radio broadcasts of concerts on WGY radio station. Their factory located at Fullerton just west of Pulaski (then Crawford) still stands, even though operations have moved to another part of the city.
I dedicate this Mini Cake Museum post to my 900th follower mark2wen (or maybe it’s hopeluststeam). It’s such a special occasion, so why not eat some cake? Okay, the cake might be made of Styrofoam, but the icing is real…and it’s the thought that counts. In the 1970s “Cake Lady” Frances Kuyper, a self-taught cake decorator and instructor, bought a second home to showcase her love of all things cake. Her collection consisted of 150 demo cakes, 90 instruction video tapes and over 500 cake decorating books. After Kuyper’s husband died in 1999, the cake collection moved to the Hollenbeck Palms Retirement Home in East Los Angeles. When Kuyper died last year, a San Fernando Occupational Center expressed interest in saving her cake-decorating models. In case you happen to find yourself taking MANICURING 1 at the school next fall, the items will be displayed in Room 49. That’s good to hear. Because that Princess Diana Cake must live on for future generations.
Oh, and don’t forget to pick up a copy of A Bitter-Sweet Life, Frances Kuyper’s autobiography. It is available here. Yes, it’s $68, rachellleeroth - it’s because Frances was no ordinary lady…she was a CAKE LADY!!!
