This Belongs in a Museum
Bringing you museum-approved grammatical errors and typos since 2010.
Oh, and sorry - I DO NOT FOLLOW BACK!
A pizzeria and pastry shop in Redford, Michigan has more than just calzones and cannoli, it’s also home to Italian immigrant Silvio Barile’s Italian American Artistic Museum. A sculptor for over five decades, the museum combines his birthplace and new home with not just statuary but strange and somewhat confusing “exhibits”. One is titled Museo-Della Civilta-Romana (Museum of Roman Civilization) that includes old Italian postcards, a portrait of Pope John Paul II (the new Pope gets a shout out too), some nun dolls, a Julius Caesar statue along with the Statue of Liberty, a Napoleon bust, a Canadian Mountie on horseback, Detroit Red Wings bobble heads and a cowboy doll wearing an oversized copper hat. Something tells me I missed that one history class where the teacher talked about Caesar playing hockey. Oops!
But the olive-tree and clutter filled interior is nothing compared to what visitors find behind this homemade pizza parlor museum. The number of statues increase in not just quantity, but size. There is a concrete Vesuvius erupting red lava blobs next to a yellow day-glo cement rendition of the Alamo. A glittering and smiling Julius Caesar, below a Roman triumphal arch, is titled “For George Bush and the People of America”. And why you might ask? According to Silvio, he likes Bush because neither of them know how to spell. Yeah, but can Bush sculpt and sing opera and make pizza at the same time? I don’t think so. Across the back alley is “Silvio’s American Forum”, a maze of monumental sculptures and obelisks, some towering 25 feet high, of subjects that include George Washington, Louis Armstrong, the fantasy marriage of John F. Kennedy and Marilyn Monroe, the Three Stooges and Silvio himself dressed in Roman regalia. His statues are all made of pebbles and glass mortared directly into cement, so they kind of all look the same to most visitors. Therefore, Silvio identifies each one with inscribed Roman-style capital letters (of course). Maybe that’s not a great idea from a curatorial perspective, but this isn’t your everyday museum. Arrivederci!
(Info Source) (Image Source 1, 2, 3, 4)
One might jump to the assumption that the only person crazy enough to collect over 1,800 tubes of toothpaste would be a dentist — and guess what? You’re right. At the moment, the only guy to have such a collection is, in fact, a dentist named Dr. Val Kolpakov from Saginaw, Michigan, who began his collection back in 2002, and it’s grown to include unusual flavors, misprinted tubes and historical samples. About one fourth of the items are on display in his office waiting room (He specializes in dentures, by the way). Some of the more unusual toothpastes include Hazelnut Chocolate from Italy (Um…okay), Scotch Whiskey 6 Proof and the 31 flavors of Breath Palette (Indian Curry, Pumpkin Pudding or Sweet Salt? How about neither?). The most valuable item in Dr. Val’s collection, is an antique Georgian tooth powder box, from 1801, that cost him $1,500. Back then toothpaste wasn’t even invented. Also, there is WWII era radioactive Doramund toothpaste, when people believed radioactive materials would help rebuild gum tissue. Again…WTF?
We’re happy to find out this dedicated obsessiveness has paid off. The Guinness World Records will soon recognize Dr. Val for having the world’s largest toothpaste collection.
And if you liked that Scotch Whiskey Toothpaste, there are plenty more alcoholic treats for you to brush with, just chose between bourbon, red wine, amaretto or champagne.
As post offices across America possibly close their doors forever, I thought this would be a good time to tell you about one of the largest U.S. Postal Service museums in the country. Believe it or not, a rather small town in the middle of Michigan (also home to the American Museum of Magic, covered here back in December) is only surpassed by the Smithsonian Institution in terms of all things postal. I personally bumped into this place while driving around the state last month. Unfortunately, I was late (kind of like my mailman) so it was not open.
Established 25 years ago, the museum has 4,000 artifacts one would expect at such a place, like old uniforms, rural carrier memorabilia and post office equipment. Once located in the the basement of the historic Schragg Marshall post office the museum now has its own building as you can see in the above picture taken by yours truly. Interesting to note - the town of Marshall (population 7,459) not only has two random museums but also a house straight out of Honolulu and two stagecoach inns still in operation. Sometimes the middle of nowhere is actually somewhere…and it doesn’t make any sense.
Cross in the Woods is a National Catholic Shrine located in Northern Michigan. Hundreds of thousands visit every year to see what is considered the largest crucifix in the world (31 feet high to be exact). During theses pilgrimages, I hope people also pay their respects to the Nun Doll Museum. Yep, another world’s largest…but this time it’s a collection of dolls dressed in traditional religious attire. Well, someone’s gotta do it. And that someone is Sally Rogalski, who began collecting and dressing dolls in 1945. She thought of it as a way to “preserve a bit of the history of the Catholic Church”. In 1964, she donated 230 dolls with the request that admission never be charged to view the dolls. Free? I likey. The collection has since grown to 525 dolls and 20 mannequins that represent the Diocesan clergy and more than 217 religious orders. And just to show that God approves…Sally and her husband received a blessing and citation from Pope John Paul II for “helping to promote vocations to the priesthood and religious life through their doll collection”.
AMEN! CAN I GET A WITNESS?
At Ferris State University in Big Rapids, Michigan, you will find the Jim Crow Museum of Racist Memorabilia. For nearly 40 years, Curator David Pilgrim has collected what he calls “racist garbage”. It is his belief that “forms of intolerance can be used to teach tolerance”. The museum displays a wide variety of artifacts, including cartoons, figurines and advertising, that depict the history of racist portrayals of African Americans in everyday American popular culture. The traveling exhibit “Hateful Things” samples the museum’s 4,000 pieces and has made its way around the state of Michigan as well as at other various colleges and universities.
I’d like a magic potion from the American Museum of Magic, possibly to be used to buy a magical lottery ticket for a billion gazillion dollars. That would make 2011 a pretty good year. Located in Marshall, Michigan, the museum is one of 10 museums devoted to magical subjects. Some famous ones include Scranton’s Houdini Museum and the Musée de la Magie in the Marquis de Sade’s house in Paris.
But the one in Michigan is the largest magic museum in the United States with half a million pieces of magical paraphernalia and illusions, including a large display of devices that once belonged to famed magician Harry Blackstone, Sr. (how freakin’ exciting!). What’s even cooler is that they have a separate library and research center full of 50,000 magical books. It’s just up the road from Colon, Michigan, considered the “The Magic Capital of the World”. Colon is also the home of Abbott’s Magic Company, the grave of that Blackstone guy and the annual Colon Magic Festival.
