In honour of Yahoo!!!!!! buying Tumblr (and killing it, because we know that’s eventually going to happen…I mean you heard what they did to Flickr, right?) let’s talk about a dead museum. We’ve covered closed museums before (Red Baron Museum, Museum of Funeral Customs and Museum of Menstruation immediately come to mind) so it won’t hurt to add another one to the list.
Unfortunately, visitors to the Million Dollar Museum in New Mexico did not receive a huge chunk of change to take home with them to hide under their mattresses. Money wasn’t even the theme of place. Instead the museum randomly gathered together everything weird and creepy, and I’m not talking about Donald Trump’s hair.
The entrance to the museum only hinted at what lurked ahead. After walking by various pieces of taxidermy, as well as video games and coin operated peep shows, visitors would go downstairs to the basement to check out eleven dust-filled rooms. Over 50,000 items, including a room full of busted typewriters and longhorns, were found in this hoarder’s gangsta paradise. But that’s not the really weird part. Next to the jars of “alien baby” mummies and two-headed animals was a collection of European Dollhouses. In another display case, four skulls of an ancient people called “Basket Makers” were seated on flat baskets, just in case you didn’t get the basket connection. Next to a 19th century horse-drawn hearse was some weird contraption hanging on the wall marked, “Used for Smoking Bees.” Something I’ve always been meaning to do, just haven’t got around to it!
The place was like a garage sale that’s gone on for decades and no one told the person to call it a motherfuckin’ day. Or you can say it was like a very, very, very bad episode of ‘Hoarders’. The name of the museum implies that all this stuff is worth a million dollars. Right. Bitch, you’re delusional! Well, anyway it’s long gone, the odd and curious contents of the Million Dollar Museum were auctioned off in 2008, scattered in the wind, probably to other hoarder-doms. Now the museum is worth zero dollars, kind of like my bank account.